21 July 2016

The Yorks after 30 Years

By Elke Wetzig (Elya) via Wikimedia Commons
I distinctly remember the first time people magazine speculated that Prince Andrew, second son of Queen Elizabeth II, was about to announce his engagement to a feisty redhead named Sarah Ferguson. I was devastated. Although I was only 15 at the time, my plan was to grow up and somehow get him to fall in love with me. Alas, Sarah beat me to him, having met him when she was only 12 (and I had just been born). The two grew up in the same circles thanks to her father's involvement in the world of polo. Andrew didn't really play, but he was around sometimes to watch his older brother, The Prince of Wales, whose polo manager was Sarah's dad.

And so it was at the polo field that the fairy tale really began, when a fairy godmother named Diana decided to play matchmaker. She could often be seen laughing it up with Sarah, aka "Fergie", while her husband played. Just a few years into her own not-so-fairy-tale marriage, Diana was likely already feeling stifled and lonely. What fun, she thought, to invite the boisterous Fergie to the Royal Family's Scottish castle just when she knew Prince Andrew would be there. Equally fun-loving and boisterous, the spark between Andrew and Sarah this time was instantaneous and unquenchable. Their romance was one of genuine affection and, 30 years later, their bond is as strong as ever. Perhaps even stronger with the struggles they have faced and the maturity that even the biggest party animals gain over time.

In re-watching clips of their wedding day, it is clear that the newly titled Duke and Duchess of York were absolutely smitten. Every member of the family also had pure joy written across their faces. It was an exuberant day, less grand than Charles and Diana's wedding five years earlier. The world was worshiping at Diana's feet, but Sarah was clearly a star despite her less than noble birth. Diana was the daughter of a Peer of the Realm; Sarah was from a much lower rung of Britain's stratified upper class. She showed none of the demure, ladylike qualities of her new sister-in-law. She was just an ordinary girl. As one American broadcaster remarked that day, every girl wished she could be Diana on her wedding day, but when Sarah married her prince, every girl could say "that is me."



The sunshine of that day turned out not to be so eternal. As an active duty military officer, Andrew was away more than he was at home. Like Diana, Sarah was left to figure out her royal role without much guidance and without her husband anywhere nearby. She did things her own way: learning to fly a helicopter to better understand her husband's work, joking loudly with reporters who followed her, openly flirting with people in the crowds she encountered. While Americans adored her, her boisterous nature soon began to wear on the stiff-upper lips of Britain. The media began to grab onto any little flaw--her questionable fashion choices, her constant struggles with her weight (at least one photo from her second child's christening even bore the remarkably crass headline, "Huge-Genie"), and more seriously, her tendency to spend beyond her means. The media constantly compared her to the still saintly Diana who seemed to be always elegant, always gentle, always slim, and Sarah did not measure well in the unfair comparison, especially in the fashion stakes. After all, The Prince of Wales has access to an enormous income that dwarfed what his little brother could provide Sarah.

She fell as quickly as she rose. But she was, as she has admitted, her own worst enemy. Yes, she felt sabotaged by the Palace insiders, whom she called the "men in gray," but she was allegedly more popular with her in-laws than Diana. After all, The Queen loves nothing more than horses and the two often rode together, and Prince Philip has always had a penchant for living a bit boisterously, too.

Unfortunately, however, Sarah pushed the limits too far and one of her enemies made sure that the press had the proof of it. Initially, it was intimated that she was spending too much time with a rich Texan, but everything fell apart when photos were published of her on holiday with another American (her financial adviser). Sunbathing topless, with her young daughters nearby, the Duchess was clearly cavorting with a man who was not her husband. (At least, I've never known a financial adviser whose services included sucking a client's toes.)

Within a year, the Yorks had separated and four years later their divorce was final. But, their relationship was not at an end. After their marital home, a gift from The Queen, was sold, Sarah and their daughters moved in with Andrew. Today, 20 years after their divorce, the couple still lives together at Royal Lodge in Windsor Great Park, which was renovated for them after the death of the previous Duchess of York (better known as Queen Elizabeth The Queen Mother).

Despite a potpourri of less-than-royal behaviors (confessional books, jobs hawking products from weight-loss programs to dishware, numerous media interviews), constant money problems, and more scandals caught on tape (Sarah allegedly tried to sell access to her ex who was serving as Britain's Special Ambassador for Trade and Investment), the couple has remained remarkably loyal to each other and they seem to have done an excellent job of co-parenting their daughters, Princess Beatrice and Princess Eugenie, who are both well-educated, lovely young women.

Beyond all the negatives heaped up against her, Sarah has continuously supported a variety of causes and considers herself a philanthropist. She even founded two charitable organizations of her own: Children in Crisis in 1993 and The Sarah Ferguson Foundation, both of which support children at risk. Two years ago, the four Yorks together launched a new organization, Key to Freedom, to provide economic opportunities for women in India.



Through it all, Sarah's public persona has remained as boisterous as ever. She is photographed at night clubs "on the pull" with her daughters, she holidays around the world, often with Andrew and the girls. She herself has said that they are the happiest divorced people in the world. During The Queen's Diamond Jubilee, she was even listed officially as a member of the Royal Family and she continues to assert that her former mother-in-law is the person she admires most in the world. Sarah can often be seen accompanying Beatrice, Eugenie and Andrew at public events, including high profile occasions like the funeral of Diana Princess of Wales and Andrew's investiture in the Royal Victorian Order.

In 2016, on a visit to Australia, Sarah appeared on a radio program. While refusing to be drawn into a conversation about the level of intimacy between her and Andrew, she gushed, "It was the greatest day of my life, marrying the finest man...and he is the finest man in my life. He's a great gentleman and he's got an essence of gold. In 1986 on July 23rd I completely threw myself in to the most incredible love affair for life."

The last century's devoted but scandalous royal lovers, The Duke and Duchess of Windsor, were able to maintain a long marriage, but their existence seemed increasingly sad and hollow. This generation's scandalous royal lovers, The Duke and Duchess of York, may have officially ended their marriage but it is clear that they remain very happily in each others' lives and hearts, and I have no doubt that there is no royal household that is filled with more laughter and fun than theirs, even now.

17 July 2016

A (Furry) Year with the Duchess

Camilla Parker Bowles - Duchess of Cornwall
By KoronaLacassePhoto 
via Wikimedia Commons
As we honor the 69th birthday of The Duchess of Cornwall, wife of The Prince of Wales, I thought we should take a look back at the last yea but in a very special way. The former Camilla Parker-Bowles (nee Shand) has a great love of furry creatures--dogs and horses especially. Fortunately, being a royal affords her many opportunities to make four-legged friends all over the world. Whether it was visiting the Duchy of Cornwall, making an official tour of Australia and New Zealand, or going about public and personal activities back in the UK, Camilla always took the time to pat a new pal. Often, she shared her love of animals with her husband and on occasion got to bond with her mother-in-law over this shared interest.

Sometimes, she met service animals or show animals. Other times, she happened upon the beloved companions of people who gather in the streets to meet a visiting royal. She also lent her support to charities dedicated to protecting animals as well as organizations that employ animals to assist people. In fact, Camilla's other great interests, such as supporting those with osteoporosis or promoting reading, often use animals to extend their work.

She even managed to meet at least one unicorn. Meanwhile, interactions with other creatures were less predictably...




01 June 2016

Remembering the Royal Ladies of Nepal



Queen Aishwarya looked around the room at her extended family. Her husband the King sat at the head of the group surrounded by his children, siblings, nieces and nephews. As with all families, there were disputes and disagreements, but the ruling house always clung to this tradition of gathering together for dinner once each month. Aishwarya and King Birendra had married in a grand ceremony 30 years earlier and had led the country together for nearly 29 of those years.

Perhaps Aishwarya had been a little too influential early on, but she was respected for her beauty and her support of social programs and her interest in culture. She herself was a poet and composer. More importantly, she had ably fulfilled the role of any royal consort: producing a children. Crown Prince Dipendra arrived soon after their wedding, followed five years later by Princess Shruti, and three years after that by Prince Nirajan. All three of her children were seated around the room.

Now 24, Princess Shruti was already of mother of two herself, with her second daughter arriving just eight months ago. Shruti was beautiful like her mother and well-educated, having completed a bachelor's degree from the women's college in the capitol city of Kathmandu.

Aishwarya's younger sister, Princess Komal, was in attendance with her husband, Prince Gyanendra, one of the king's brothers. The double relationship as both sisters and sisters-in-law only strengthened their commitment to the crown and the country. The two even looked alike. Komal had added two children, a son and a daughter, to their joint dynasty.

Scanning the familiar faces, Aishwarya also saw her other royal sisters-in-law. The eldest, Princess Shanti was also university-educated and renowned for her work in social welfare, particularly for those suffering from leprosy, for which she had founded her own charity, and people with disabilities. She also took on the causes of family planning, and animal welfare, and like many princesses around the world, was actively engaged with the Red Cross. She had married very well and was now the Rani of Bajhang and mother of three.

The king's second eldest sister, Princess Sharada, had also completed a university education and taken on issues of social welfare through the Red Cross and other organizations. Her greatest areas of concern were disaster relief and children, which led her to launch the Nepal branch of the SOS Children's Villages to provide homes, care and education for orphans. She believed her mission in life was to raise social consciousness.

Their youngest sister Princess Shova had an identical education and concern for the well-being of individuals. She also devoted herself to the Red Cross and her own family, with three daughters of her own. The other royal ladies at the dinner included the king's cousin Princess Jayanti who had devoted her life to supporting research and treatment for cancer and heart disease. She had even presented papers at important conferences around the world. Jayanti's younger sister, Mrs. Ketaki Chester, who had surrendered her royal titles for love years earlier was also there.

It was an ordinary gathering except the tensions between Aishwarya's oldest son, Crown Prince Dipendra, and his father the king were reaching a boiling point. Dipendra seemed to stumbling over himself and behaving badly. Perhaps he had grown tired of fighting with his father about his own marriage. At 30, the prince's marriage was becoming incredibly urgent, but he wanted to marry a young woman of whom both his parents disapproved. But, his behavior this evening was beyond anything the family had seen before. After one too many boorish acts, the Crown Prince was sent to his room like a child, escorted their by his brother and a cousin.

Finally, the party could continue. Or so it seemed. Within minutes, Dipendra returned, now dressed in military fatigues and carrying several automatic weapons. Ketaki leaned over to her sister, Princess Jayanti and whispered, "Isn't he too old to be showing off those guns?" Unusual behavior, but no one felt threatened even as the Crown Prince approached the king. So, they thought, he's returned to show the king his weapons like a boy playing soldier? Then, one of the guns went off, wounding the king and then firing blindly into the ceiling from the massive recoil. As several family members rushed to the bleeding king's side, Dipendra fled, but then returned again to kick his father's body. His favorite uncle stepped in front of him, "you've done enough," he said, but those were his final words.

Perhaps in shock over killing his favorite uncle, Dipendra began shooting indiscriminately around the room. One cousin shoved some of the children to safety behind a sofa, but others were falling quickly. Not realizing that her own arm had been shattered, Ketaki tried to help a cousin. Across the room, she could see her sister dying. She saw the king's sister-in-law Komal bleeding profusely from the chest and Dipendra's young sister gasping to breathe in a pool of her own blood.

Queen Aishwarya's disfigured
face was covered by a china
mask at her funeral.
Image by Duvilar
via Wikimedia Commons
Barely five minutes had passed, when Dipendra rushed out of the room, with his mother and his brother in pursuit. Startled he turned and killed his brother. "You have killed your father. You have killed your brother," Aishwarya cried out. "Kill me too." He did.

Palace guards pursued him, shooting Dipendra at least six times in the back, before he shot himself. Still alive, he was taken to a hospital and declared king upon the death of the father he had murdered. His sister died at the hospital not far from him. Princess Komal struggled to recover from the wound in her chest while Ketaki never regained full use of her arm. The only survivor among the king's immediate family was Princess Shruti's husband, who was left with two young daughters to raise.

In all ten members of the royal family were massacred. Dipendra had killed his father, mother, brother, and sister, his favorite uncle, his aunts Shanti and Sharada, Sharada's husband, and his father's cousin Jayanti. The tenth victim, Dipendra himself, died a few days later.

The ultimate casualty, however, was the Nepalese crown itself. Although Dipendra's only surviving uncle, Prince Gyanendra (who had been out of the country during the massacre), became king with his recovered wife Princess Komal at his side, the monarchy lasted less than seven years. After three centuries as the rulers of Nepal, the Shah dynasty was swept away by the Nepalese Constituent Assembly in favor of a federal democratic republic.